January 5, 2015
My Sponge Theory
This New Year is really allowing me to look inside with an honesty I’ve never given myself the energy to do.
A distant schoolmate that I was friends with on Facebook passed. I didn’t personally know this woman besides the few years in school. We were not adult friends outside of Facebook. I have taken this death rather hard. Her struggles were unreal with mental issues, which brought family issues. I have no details surrounding her death but my mind swirls with suspect and I cringe at how easy Mental Illness can pull a family down a dark unpromising hall.
Taking the kids to return Red Box movies….that low and behold we had forgotten to grab….I pulled over out of respect for a funeral procession. Trying to explain to the children why I was delaying the trip to town to pull over and allow the grief stricken to pass (knowing at least my little spongy heart was trying to absorb some of the grief that spilled over out of the procession), I completely lost control of my emotions, my eyes started a controlled Niagra that would have made the Park proud! I was full. So much pain! I was full of others pain…I’m not sure that makes any sense… but it wasn’t my pain.
My life is unbelievably full…I hope in my own little way, I helped those that I sponged up.
My children understood and I know in their own way they are sponges too. The slightest touch on my shoulder from the backseat my son says, “Mommy, you sure are a good Mommy for teaching us to show respect to those sad people. Thanks for that, thanks for being such a good Mommy.” I was FULL again.
This livingoffcrumbs stuff IS enough!
PS. We didn’t have the movies. We were missioned out for this life lesson…thanks for letting me share my mission of the day with you!